Husband Stopped Talking: Seeking Guidance and Patience in a Troubled Marriage

When a Husband Stops Communicating: Finding a Way Forward

Question: I have been married for thirteen years, and we have three children. My husband travels a lot, and I live with my in-laws. Our life was going well, with my husband visiting once a week or every ten days, and we talked throughout the day on the phone. But suddenly, my husband stopped talking to me. He wouldn’t even answer my calls. After many attempts, when he finally answered, he told me to stop calling, saying he doesn’t want to talk. This affected me deeply; I cried, pleaded for forgiveness if I had done something wrong, but there was no response. I even sought help from my family, but nothing changed. Now, he comes home once every two or three months, stays for a few days, but there is no communication, no marital relationship, and no phone conversations. I am very distressed and don’t know what to do. Please advise.

Answer: This is a painful situation, and may Allah give you the strength and patience to deal with it. It is essential that you sit down with your husband and discuss the matter in the presence of a knowledgeable scholar who can mediate. You should both listen to each other and find out what the issue is — whether your husband is upset about something or if there is an external problem. Therefore, I advise you to seek out a reliable scholar in your area, schedule a meeting, and have a discussion with your husband. Also, try to involve supportive family members from your in-laws who can help.

Do not lose hope; keep praying to Allah, and avoid resorting to talismans or charms, as these are innovations and offer no benefit. If your husband continues to provide for your basic needs, such as food and shelter, then be patient. Allah is with those who are patient.

Respondent: Sheikh Maqbool Ahmed Salafi Hafizahullah 

Jeddah Dawah Center, Saudi Arabia  

Interpreter: Hasan Fuzail