The Rulings of the Third Divorce in Islam: Laws, Waiting Period, and Reconciliation
The system of divorce in Islam is undoubtedly present, though it has always been criticized by non-Muslims and even some modern-minded Muslims. Allah’s law is perfectly aligned with human nature, designed for the benefit of humanity, and we must believe in it wholeheartedly. The wisdom behind these laws might not always be evident, but this does not justify their misuse. Threatening a wife with divorce over trivial matters, frequently mentioning divorce, or tying divorce to unrelated issues are inappropriate actions. We should fear Allah regarding women and strive to exhibit exemplary conduct toward our families.
Abdullah bin Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:
خيرُكم خيرُكم لأهلِه وأنا خيرُكم لأهلِي (صحيح ابن ماجه:1621)
“The best of you is the one who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family.”
Thus, both husband and wife should try to tolerate each other and avoid reaching the stage of divorce as much as possible.
According to the Islamic system of divorce, a man is granted the authority to issue three divorces but cannot issue all three at once. If someone mistakenly gives three divorces in one sitting, only one divorce will be considered valid. Just as a man does not have the authority to issue four divorces, similarly, he does not have the authority to issue three divorces at once.
If a man has already given two divorces at separate intervals and now issues the third divorce, the rulings concerning this are as follows:
Reconciliation After the Third Divorce
After the third divorce, the man has no right to reconcile. Reconciliation is only allowed after the first and second divorces. The evidence is in Allah’s statement:
ٱلطَّلَٰقُ مَرَّتَانِۖ فَإِمسَاكُۢ بِمَعرُوفٍ أَوۡ تَسرِيحُۢ بِإِحسَٰن (البقرة:229)
“Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment.”
The Waiting Period (Iddah) After the Third Divorce
After the third divorce, the waiting period for a woman is three menstrual cycles (if she is not pregnant), as stated by Allah:
وَالمُطَلَّقَاتُ يَتَرَبَّصْنَ بِأَنْفُسِهِنَّ ثَلَاثَةَ قُرُوءٍ (البقرة:228)
“And divorced women shall wait [as regards their marriage] for three menstrual periods.”
This waiting period may take three months, less, or more, depending on the menstrual cycles.
For a pregnant woman, her waiting period lasts until delivery, as stated by Allah:
وَأُولَاتُ الْأَحْمَالِ أَجَلُهُنَّ أَن يَضَعْنَ حَمْلَهُنَّ (الطلاق:4)
“And for those who are pregnant, their term is until they give birth.”
For women who do not experience menstruation, the waiting period is three months, as Allah says:
وَاللَّائِي يَئِسْنَ مِنَ الْمَحِيضِ مِن نِّسَائِكُمْ إِنِ ارْتَبْتُمْ فَعِدَّتُهُنَّ ثَلَاثَةُ أَشْهُرٍ وَاللَّائِي لَمْ يَحِضْنَ ۚ (الطلاق:4)
“And for those women who have despaired of menstruation—if you doubt, their waiting period is three months, as well as for those who have not menstruated.”
Place of Observing Iddah After the Third Divorce
After the third divorce, the woman observes her waiting period at her parents’ home because the third divorce constitutes an irrevocable separation (talaq mughallazah). After this, the husband cannot reconcile or remarry her without a valid halala (remarriage to another man followed by divorce). During this waiting period, the woman is not entitled to maintenance or housing, except in the case of pregnancy.
Fatimah bint Qais narrated:
يا رسولَ اللهِ! زوجي طلقني ثلاثًا . وأخافُ أن يُقْتَحَمَ عليَّ. قال: فأمرها فتحولتْ . (صحيح مسلم:1482)
“O Messenger of Allah, my husband has divorced me three times, and I fear someone might break in on me.” So, the Prophet ﷺ allowed her to shift (to another place).”
Maintenance After the Third Divorce
After the third divorce, the woman is not entitled to maintenance or housing. The evidence is the narration:
عن النبيِّ صلَّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّمَ، في المطلقةِ ثلاثًا. قال: “ليس لها سُكنى ولا نفقةٌ” (صحيح مسلم:1480)
“The Prophet ﷺ said regarding a thrice-divorced woman: ‘She has no right to housing or maintenance.’”
However, if the woman is pregnant, the husband must bear her expenses until she delivers, as stated by Allah:
وَإِنْ كُنَّ أُولَاتِ حَمْلٍ فَأَنْفِقُوا عَلَيْهِنَّ حَتَّى يَضَعْنَ حَمْلَهُنَّ (الطلاق:6)
“And if they are pregnant, then spend on them until they deliver their burden.”
This includes housing, childbirth expenses, food, clothing, and medical costs for the baby until delivery.
The Woman’s Wealth
After divorce, the husband cannot take anything from the woman’s personal wealth or the mahr (dowry) given to her unless she willingly offers it. Allah says:
وَلَا يَحِلُّ لَكُمْ أَنْ تَأْخُذُوا مِمَّا آَتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ شَيْئًا (البقرة:229)
“And it is not lawful for you to take anything of what you have given them.”
This applies even more strictly if the mahr has not yet been paid, as mahr is the woman’s right and should be fulfilled without delay. Similarly, any loans the woman may have given to her husband must be repaid. However, gifts given out of goodwill by the woman are not obligatory for the husband to return unless he wishes to do so.
Inheritance
If the husband dies during the waiting period of the first or second divorce, the woman is entitled to inherit from him. However, if the third divorce has occurred, whether during or after the waiting period, she is no longer entitled to inheritance because the marital bond, which forms the basis for inheritance, has ended.
The Rights of Raising Children After Divorce:
After divorce, the issue of child custody arises—who has more right over the child’s upbringing? In Islam, the mother has the greater right to raise the child. However, if the mother marries another man after completing her iddah, then the father will have the right to raise the child.
Abdullah bin Amr (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates:
أنَّ امرأةً قالَت يا رسولَ اللَّهِ إنَّ ابني هذا كانَ بطني لَه وعاءً وثَديي لَه سِقاءً وحجري لَه حِواءً وإنَّ أباهُ طلَّقني وأرادَ أن ينتزِعَه منِّي فقالَ لَها رسولُ اللَّهِ صلَّى اللَّهُ عليهِ وسلَّمَ أنتِ أحقُّ بِه ما لم تَنكِحي (صحيح أبي داود:2276)
Translation: A woman came to the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) and said, “This is my son. My belly was his container, my breast was his drinking vessel, and my lap was his cradle. His father has divorced me, and now he wants to take him away from me.” The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, “You have more right to him as long as you do not remarry.”
However, when the child reaches maturity, he has the right to choose between the mother or the father.
Abu Maymunah Sulami narrates that a Persian woman came to the Prophet (peace be upon him) after her husband had divorced her, and both parents were claiming custody of the child. The Prophet (peace be upon him) told the child:
هذا أبوكَ وهذهِ أمُّكَ فخذ بيدِ أيِّهما شئتَ فأخذَ بيدِ أمِّهِ فانطلقَتْ بهِ (صحيح أبي داود:2277)
Translation: “This is your father, and this is your mother. Take the hand of whichever one you wish.” The child took his mother’s hand, and she took him away.
From birth until puberty, the father is responsible for the child’s financial needs. This is supported by the following verse from the Quran:
وَعَلَى الْمَوْلُودِ لَهُ رِزْقُهُنَّ وَكِسْوَتُهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ ۚ لَا تُكَلَّفُ نَفْسٌ إِلَّا وُسْعَهَا ۚ لَا تُضَارَّ وَالِدَةٌ بِوَلَدِهَا وَلَا مَوْلُودٌ لَّهُ بِوَلَدِهِ ۚ وَعَلَى الْوَارِثِ مِثْلُ ذَٰلِكَ ۗ (البقرۃ:233)
Translation: “And upon the father of the child is their provision and clothing according to what is acceptable. No soul is burdened beyond its capacity. No mother shall be harmed because of her child, nor shall a father be harmed because of his child. And upon the inheritor is the like thereof.”
Marriage After the Third Divorce:
After the third divorce, the woman will be separated from the man, and she cannot remarry him. However, there is a possibility for remarriage if she marries another man (with the intention of establishing a family, not as a scheme). That man must consummate the marriage, and then he can divorce her of his own free will. After she completes her iddah, she may remarry her first husband. Allah says:
فَإِن طَلَّقَهَا فَلَا تَحِلُّ لَهُ مِن بَعْدُ حَتَّىٰ تَنكِحَ زَوْجًا غَيْرَهُ ۗ فَإِن طَلَّقَهَا فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْهِمَا أَن يَتَرَاجَعَا إِن ظَنَّا أَن يُقِيمَا حُدُودَ اللَّهِ ۗ وَتِلْكَ حُدُودُ اللَّهِ يُبَيِّنُهَا لِقَوْمٍ يَعْلَمُونَ (البقرۃ:230)
Translation: “Then, if he divorces her (the third time), she is not lawful for him until she marries another husband. Then if that husband divorces her, there is no sin upon both of them if they return to each other, provided they think they can keep the limits of Allah. And those are the limits of Allah, which He makes clear to the people who know.”
The Practice of ‘Halala’ After the Third Divorce:
In some societies, the practice of ‘halala’ (the ritualistic remarriage) is widespread. This involves a woman being married to a close man for one night and then being divorced so that she can remarry her first husband. This form of halala is not valid in Islam. It is not a legitimate way for a woman to return to her first husband and is considered a form of fornication. Allah’s curse is upon those who engage in or facilitate such practices.
The proper way of ‘halala’ is that the woman marries another man with the intention of establishing a family, and the second husband consummates the marriage. If the second husband later divorces her, then she may return to her first husband after completing her iddah.
The Ruling on Giving Three Divorces at Once:
It should also be noted that if a woman is given three divorces in one statement or in one sitting, it will not count as three divorces; it will count as one. The man can return to his wife during the three menstrual cycles (iddah). If this period of three cycles passes, he may remarry her through a new contract.
By Maqbool Ahmad Salafi
Islamic Da’wah Center – Ta’if