What to Expect from a Sunnah-Based Marriage: A Guide for the Righteous
Marriage upon Sunnah?
You want a righteous man, but do you know what that means? It means he won’t take you out on your birthday, he won’t celebrate anniversaries, he will want you to cover according to the Qur’ān and Sunnah, he will expect you to seek knowledge as that’s what he will be upon.
He won’t allow you to work with men, nor will he let you upload selfies on Instagram or these ‘couple pictures’ because he’s a real man and he has gheerah.
So when you fantasize over beards and trousers above the ankles and say you want to marry a man of the sunnah, know that you must be a woman of the sunnah.
Things like this don’t just come. Social media hypes up the idea of marriage through these couple selfies or even couples giving dawah and what not and you think that’s marriage? Wake up.
We look at the marriage of Ā’isha رضي الله عنها with the Prophet ﷺ and we all love the idea of it, but are we willing to give that?
Ā’isha رضي الله عنها narrated that 3 months would go by and they would not eat a thing other than dates and water
[Sahih Bukhari].
SubḥānAllāh. Stop sitting here on Instagram dreaming about your perfect life with the perfect man, it is not reality. There’s sacrifice and compromise, all for the sake of Allāh.
So many sisters love saying “I’m not going to cook or clean” sis what do you mean? These times after you are married and reality hits you, you’re watching tutorials of how to hoover the living room. Marriage is serious.
You’re not going to cook? So he’s going to spend the day earning a living to feed you and the family and you’re not going to cook or clean?
Deluded.
Then, there’s the other type. Some sisters, don’t want a righteous man, they don’t want someone who is ‘strict in Deen’ rather they want someone who is more easygoing. Well, that’s a calamity, at least the first type there’s a chance that he may be able to influence you to be on the same path as him, but this lenient one will drag you down with him. What a mess.
“Let’s upload pictures together” “Let’s go celebrate your birthday” “Jilbab/niqab isn’t necessary” “You go out and work”
“we’re low on money let’s get a loan”
“He’s playing Justin Bieber nasheeds at your wedding.”
“No problem in Hanging out with male friend”
How will we attain Jannah with this person? And you’re here arguing with your parents, the ones that raised you because they won’t let you marry him.
Solution?
Correct yourself. Learn your religion. Know Allāh. Act according to the sunnah. Be a woman upon the Qur’ān and Sunnah and work for Jannah with a man upon the Qur’ān and Sunnah. That’s how it works.
The example I gave you of Ā’isha رضي الله عنها and the Prophet ﷺ, which are the best of examples, did they have everything in life? No. Did that take away from the status Allāh granted them? No. SubhanAllah!
It’s not a joke. This religion is beautiful and as are the people that act according to it, without taking away anything from it or adding to it. Ponder Over this”
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