What to Do When Your Husband Commits Zina: Islamic Guidance
In the Name of Allāh, the Entirely Gracious, the Exclusively Merciful
Question:
A woman found out that her husband was cheating on her with another woman, and he was refusing her right of intimacy, so what is your advice for the wife knowing that she has two sons from him?
The answer:
If your intent by him cheating is that he committed zina (illegal sexual intercourse) with her, then it is not permissible for her to stay with a man who is a zani (commits illegal sexual intercourse).
Allah (سبحانه وتعالى) states:
{ٱلزَّانِى لَا يَنكِحُ إِلَّا زَانِيَةً أَوْ مُشْرِكَةًۭ وَٱلزَّانِيَةُ لَا يَنكِحُهَآ إِلَّا زَانٍ أَوْ مُشْرِكٌۭ ۚ وَحُرِّمَ ذَٰلِكَ عَلَى ٱلْمُؤْمِنِينَ}
“A male fornicator would only marry a female fornicator or idolatress. And a female fornicator would only be married to a fornicator or idolater. This is all forbidden to the believers.”
So if he has fallen into the atrocity of zina and hasn’t repented from it, and he is continuing it, still in this state, then it is not allowed for her to stay with him in such a state, and it is allowed for her to seek separation from him.
And if he repented and regrets it from his heart, and he devoted himself to never returning to doing it, then that which is best is for her to stay with him and to cover his sins. And upon them both is to safeguard their prayers having tranquility during it, as verily the prayer prevents one from immorality and evil deeds.
As for if he was communicating with her only, as is the case with some immoral open sinners with women, flirting and other than that, then it is upon her to exhort him, and to remind him of Allah, and to make him fear Him, and she must be patient upon the extortion until Allah guides him, especially if she has two sons from him. So she must be patient with him, exhort him, and make Du’a for him to be guided, and we ask Allah for success.
By Sheikh Muhammad bin Hizam